Friday, February 18, 2011

February 18, 2011

Dear Hannah,

It's so hard to believe one year ago today you were due. I wonder who you'd be today. I wonder who you'd look like, would you be taking your first steps. I wonder so many things.

We celebrated Jack's first birthday last week. He really is an adorable little boy. When I first saw him and saw him walking around it brought such a sadness to my heart. I was so proud of him and so devastated for you all in a single moment. I'm sure you're dancing in Heaven. I'm sure of that. But it doesn't mean that I wouldn't have loved to have seen it here first myself. How I love you little girl. How I ache for you. How it just consumes me sometimes. How that guilt finds me. I'm so sorry, Hannah. I'm so sorry I let you down. And it's so hard to wonder and imagine now that your little sister is here because when I do, I have to picture that dream without one of you in it. I just can't do that. I just have to accept how it is and know that someday it WILL be all of us together.

But to me, this will always be your special day. Bobby drew you some pictures and we're going to send you some balloons. I love you baby girl, always.

Love,
Mommy
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14 comments:

  1. JoannaFebruary 18, 2011 at 10:57 AM

    Sending you big hugs Katy on Hannah's special day. I'll be thinking of you today.

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  2. FranchescaFebruary 18, 2011 at 11:11 AM

    Thinking of you Katy, sending big hugs. I love the thought that she is dancing in Heaven ♥

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  3. JenniferFebruary 18, 2011 at 11:41 AM

    Sweet friend, You DID NOT let Hannah down! What more could she possibly ask for than what she has now? She is perfect, whole, happy, and dancing away in Heaven. Sending lots of love and hugs your way! Praying for you today!

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  4. AntoinetteFebruary 18, 2011 at 1:17 PM

    =**(

    love you always!!!!

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  5. UnknownFebruary 18, 2011 at 1:43 PM

    Sending hugs upward and to you sweet mama!
    ♥Hannah♥

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  6. LisetteFebruary 18, 2011 at 2:17 PM

    Sending you big ((HUGS)) and thinking of Hannah with you.

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  7. AmandaFebruary 18, 2011 at 5:06 PM

    Aww Katy..what a beautiful letter to your beautiful daughter. You are so right that we have to accept that we will all be together in Heaven one day even if we can't all be together here on Earth. Sending you many hugs and a lot of love today..

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  8. AnonymousFebruary 18, 2011 at 9:48 PM

    Love you and Hannah too. (from Kristie)

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  9. The Blue SparrowFebruary 19, 2011 at 12:12 AM

    Thinking of you & remembering Hannah with you! (((HUGS)))

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  10. LeaFebruary 19, 2011 at 12:56 PM

    Katy ~ your letter to Hannah is so full of love. You are amazing. Hannah is amazing... she has touched me deeply. Thinking of you.

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  11. Sarita BoyetteFebruary 20, 2011 at 5:10 AM

    Katy,my heart hurts for you. Sending love & prayers, and remembering Hannah.

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  12. NatashaFebruary 21, 2011 at 7:19 AM

    Thinking of you Katy...sending lots of love and prayers your way.
    ♥Hannah♥

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  13. AndreaFebruary 23, 2011 at 11:45 AM

    I've seen a few ladybugs about recently. :) Hannah is in my thoughts and so are you! Love you! XOXO

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  14. brian7October 26, 2011 at 1:40 PM

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    ReplyDelete

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