Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day

I just wanted to wish each and every one of you a Happy Mother's Day. I remember thinking how this year it would no longer be just Bobby, but Hannah would be here, too. And yet while she is not here physically, I know she is in spirit. I know she is in my heart.

When Bobby and I got married in October of 2006, we bought the house he grew up in from his parents. We did a lot of renovations, including ripping the entire top off to replace it with 3 new bedrooms, a loft, a wonderful bathroom and even an upper deck! But anyway, we had a central air conditioning system placed both upstairs and downstairs in 2 zones. The men were here so much we became very friendly with them. They watched as I became pregnant with Bobby and each summer watched him grow a little more. Last summer, they watched as I became pregnant with Hannah and learned we were having a girl. Well, they had to come last week for a problem we were having with the upstairs unit. When Dan was leaving my husband Bobby came inside with tears in his eyes. I asked him what was wrong. He said Dan had said how big Bobby was getting and then said, "You have a daughter, too, don't you?" Yeah. We have a daughter, too. I think it caught him off guard as he had to explain what happened. I think sometimes I forget the pain that sits on his heart as well. I am the one always asked how I am doing. I am usually the one found explaining our loss of our beautiful girl. That was a reminder to me to try to not wrap myself in my grief alone, but to share that blanket with him. It brought me a great sadness, too. Every year for Father's Day since Bobby has been born, I take his picture with a sign to put in Bobby's card. What do I do for him this year?




  1. YOU can send me a pic of hannah and i can have my friend Nicole who has made us all those pretty pics, she can put a sign onto her that says the same AND THAT IS HOW HE CAN GET ONE FROM HER TOO....IT is not right, there are no words, we just have to learn to do things "this" way now...*sigh* big time....

  2. Happy Mother's Day my friend! God bless you today.

  3. Sweetest Katy,

    What do you do for him this year? Love him, just continue to LOVE him, honor him and hold Hannah close. He feels her Katy...everyday.

    I too forget how Nicholas grieves our loss, but when in doubt, all I have to do is remember how broken he was in that very moment.

    Sending you love today...Happy Mother's Day sweet friend.


  4. I hope today was gentle to you.

    Find a Lady Bug toy and have Bobby hold it in the Father's Day picture to symbolize Hannah. We used a little stuffed Dragonfly toy in our last pictures of Ethan. And a pink gerbera in our last family pics to symbolize Shyla.

  5. I think Bobby should hold something of Hannah's, something really special to you and Bobby and Bobby. :)

  6. I wish i had the words for you at this moment but all i can do is send you hugs.